What I Learned from Nonbelievers Part 2

At a recent Explore God Discussion group believers and nonbelievers had an honest & open discussion about God. The specific topic was: “Why does God allow pain & suffering?” Another thing I learned was that some nonbelievers are perfectly ok with the randomness of suffering. This surprised me as much as anything that was said in the group.

For those of us who believe in God pain and suffering can be confusing & difficult, if not impossible, to fully understand. But, suffering always leads believers to a conversation with God. It is a test of faith, not so much whether or not our faith will survive, but how deep it will go. At times that “conversation” feels rather one-sided. All believers recall times when God felt far away or non-existent. Nevertheless, our faith pushes us to continue seeking, crying out, waiting to hear back, and taking comfort in the promises of God’s Word. We find great solace in the gospel that promises the redemption of our suffering in the end, and God’s good and holy purpose accomplished in it now. The promises are truly comforting, but it’s conversation itself that I need when suffering and disappointment crashes down on me. It is the consolation of having someone who knows how I feel and what I fear and cares and gives me peace beyond understanding.

Nonbelievers appear to need no such conversation. They say, “Suffering just happens.” It’s the way the world works. It’s science. Molecules break down. Natural disasters occur. Is there anything more impersonal and uncaring as science? Chemical reactions and molecules and nature don’t care, can’t possibly care when we suffer. One nonbeliever made the case that it is more tenable to accept the randomness of suffering rather than the alternative, that there is a God so cruel as to cause suffering. I would agree with her premise, if I accepted her concept of God as the cruel cause of suffering.

We believe in the God of love and redemption, not a God of cruelty who takes delight in the suffering of the people he created. We can debate the character of God, whether he is a God of grace and truth who redeems all suffering or not. We can all express our opinions, but in the end he is a God of love or he isn’t. He exists or he doesn’t. If he doesn’t exist or he’s committed to sadistic cruelty, then what hope is there for us when we suffer… really suffer? On the other hand, there is the deepest hope in the God revealed in Christ our Lord. And it isn’t just about heaven or life after death, it’s the conversation now. It’s the presence of God, who in Christ knows suffering personally.

Many years of being a pastor has taught me that even though I cannot “fix” someone’s troubles or stop someone’s suffering there is something about simply showing up. There is something quiet powerful in being with the one hurting. Only God can be fully present and with us in the midst of our most intense suffering, the suffering that ends in death. If there is no God, the final moments of suffering will also be unbearably lonely. Every time I go to the Lord’s Table and eat the bread of Christ and drink from his cup I am reassured that he has been through the shadow of the valley and I will not pass through it alone.

 

What I Learned from Nonbelievers

Last night I enjoyed visiting one of PCC’s home groups. It was a group that began as one of our Explore God Discussion groups that decided to continue the discussion after the official Explore God initiative was over. After the children were fed and ushered upstairs with the babysitter the seven adults took our seats in the living room. Four were believers & PCC members, another described herself as “not a believer, but open”, another described herself as an atheist, & me, “the pastor”. It was a delightful group of genuine friends having an honest and open discussion about God.

I could trumpet my success in the debate, how I bobbed and weaved to avoid the brunt of their arguments, floated like butterfly and stung like a bee delivering irrefutable theology. Actually, it wasn’t like that at all. I didn’t go to win a debate, but have a conversation, to listen and learn, as much as to share my views of God and faith. As it turned out, the two nonbelievers weren’t intimidated in the least by my clergy credentials. They didn’t hold back in sharing their views or questioning mine. Here are some things I learned from nonbelievers last night.

Hateful Christians do incredible damage to the cause of Christ. It is one thing to recognize that this is true in a general way, it’s another to sit next to someone whose been deeply wounded by a hateful believer in her own family or in her own childhood church. In her book Angry Conversations with God, Susan Isaacs describes her tortured teen years and observes, “…if just one, just one Jesus person had made me feel loved at the time, it could have changed a lot. It could have changed everything.” If I had one wish for every child growing up in PCC it would be that he or she would experience grace and love when it’s most needed. That was my own experience as young person. The love and grace I received in my most vulnerable moment served to confirm and seal my faltering, unsteady faith in Christ.

I have yet to discover an argument that heals the wounds hateful Christians inflict on struggling, searching, questioning kids in the church. The very term “hateful Christian” should be an oxymoron. How can those of us who claim to follow Christ be hateful? I’m not talking about a moment of passion when we fly off the handle and say something we immediately deeply regret. I’m talking about willfully feeding the monster of hatred so that it grows into a consuming obsession. I’m talking about unapologetic, proud, cruel, unrepentant hatred toward a group or individual. This kind of hatred often causes questioning young people in the church to conclude, “This is the way it is with God. So, I’m done with God, Christ, Church, faith, all of it.” All the believers in our little circle were quick to point out, “We’re not all like that!” But that wasn’t enough; it’s never enough. Being part of a faith community means owning the sins of our brothers. So our only defense is confession, repentance, and a plea for forgiveness on behalf of our brothers. I’m not sure I got that message across last night, but hope & pray so.

There’s much more that I learned from nonbelievers last night. I’ll add more to this blog in the coming days and weeks.